It’s been a crazy couple of months, but the grandson is back from Ohio and living with his mama again. My daughter said he was cranky on the trip back — understandable, doubly so because people at the Cleveland airport wouldn’t move their suitcases to let her or her son sit while waiting to board. Both my daughter and grandson are disabled (not a visibly obvious disability, but still…) Being on their feet for any extended period is difficult for both of them, among other things. My daughter was bedridden for a couple of days after returning. Thankfully my grandson is young enough to bounce back a little more quickly.
Disability aside, I can’t imagine forcing people to stand just so I could take up seats with my luggage.
People can be irredeemable assholes, and apparently it doesn’t even require an orange fake tan.
My daughter said her ex (grandson’s dad) had bragged to her about how they’d bought the grandson all the latest tech toys – a nice laptop, gaming system, etc. His stepmom wouldn’t allow him to bring any of it, so it was clearly never his.
The grandson (J) arrived with clothing my daughter said was in pretty sad condition. Definitely not school-worthy. School starts here in a matter of days, so my daughter took what was left of the GoFundMe money and got him some decent shoes. J has both Cystic Fibrosis and Charcot-Marie-Tooth disease, and his good shoes were a pair of worn-out Crocs. The CMT means nerve damage and weakness in his legs. Flip-flops and other badly-made shoes aggravate the issues, and possibly cause more damage.
My daughter pinched pennies on the trip and had enough left to get him a decent pair of sneakers. She also robbed Peter to pay Paul, enough to get him three shirts and three pair of pants. That was as far as she could stretch things.
I don’t blame his stepmama, who was the family’s sole breadwinner and struggling to keep them afloat. It was pretty obvious they were living hand-to-mouth. J did have a heavy winter coat, snow boots, etc., which were critical in that part of the world but are completely useless here. (They were left behind. If his stepmom doesn’t sell them she’ll probably hang onto them for her little boy.) His dad’s family wasn’t doing as well as claimed, but the stepmother kept a roof over their heads and food in their bellies, and I have to give her props for that.
Naturally, Grandma and Papa (G) came to the rescue once we saw what was going on, helping as much as we could. The trio of game-themed shirts at right, along with a couple of pair of cargo shorts, should be delivered tomorrow. (Schools here permit shorts, as long as they’re neat.) I’ll probably get him something every time I get paid for the next few months, until he’s got the basics covered.
G has an envelope with cash he set aside for J a few years ago. He’s adding to it before playing ATM Grandpa, because he says every twelve-year-old needs a little mad money. The plan is to get J a wallet and tuck the money into it. It won’t be a lot of money, but a few dollars he can call his own.
When I was a kid, I only once dared to walk into a school book fair. Even then, I looked at the books on the shelf but didn’t touch or open them. I was already terrified they’d throw me out for walking in when I didn’t have a penny. I don’t think kids need hundreds of dollars in their pockets, but I don’t want them to feel like they’re criminally poor, either.
Amazon delivered J’s new backpack today, thanks to credit card points. Thanks to all the recent overtime. I felt comfortable enough to buy a laptop, too. It’s not a great computer, but it’s all I could justify spending for now. Lenovo came through with a little Windows rig for $229. My daughter says he’s thrilled by it.
If it tells you anything about how little this kid’s had the past few years, he was so thrilled just to get the new backpack, he immediately put it on, walking around the house with it, hugging it like it was a pet. When they were looking for shoes, he’d put fairly low-priced shoes back ‘because they’re too expensive’. (He just turned twelve years old a couple of months ago.) My daughter explained to him that while we’re nowhere near rich, his shoes are part of his health and they were coming home with him.
If G and I had suspected how rough they were really having it, we’d have probably helped sooner. And we’ll probably continue to send Christmas gifts to J’s little half brother. We sent to both of them when J was living there because his brother was too little to understand why he’d be left out. Now I’m even more glad we did.
Incidentally, the “boomerang” in the title refers to his living with his mom again and returning to Arizona. He was the little one who lived with us until he was about five years old, then with his mama until a change in circumstances made it better for him to live with his daddy. Then when his dad was diagnosed with the CMT (yep, it’s hereditary) and J was diagnosed shortly after, they got the chance to move and buy a house in the Midwest for drastically less than they could rent a dump here. His wife was able to transfer on her job, and the cooler weather was better for both J’s conditions.
J’s dad died sooner than he needed to because he literally wouldn’t take care of his health. While Charcot-Marie-Tooth disease is debilitating, if you make an effort at self care, you can live a normal lifespan. Instead, he (the dad) died in his sleep at the ripe old age of 42. None of us particularly liked him, but nobody wished him dead.
I realize this entry is acronym- and initial-heavy. There’s a great deal more unsaid, because it’s still overwhelming.
While we don’t live in Phoenix proper, this is why I’m grateful we replaced our AC, and why we want to move to the Midwest.
I believe here in the boonies we “only” got to around 112º. Can’t swear to anything except it’s hot and unless/until the rains arrive, it’s unlikely to cool down again. And it’s not looking favorable for rain before at least the weekend. Of course, they’ve been predicting rain for “next weekend” for a while now. In an El Niño season, we’re known to get no rain and crazy high temperatures.
The new electric bill just came out and if we weren’t on the averaged-bill plan, we’d have owed $205-ish this month, That’s a hefty chunk of money, just not as hefty as 285 last year — when the power was off for five straight days and it wasn’t as hot as this month has been. I shudder to think what it would’ve been if we were still dealing with the old AC. I also shudder to think how hot it would’ve been in the house. The new system keeps it cool in here, consistently and with relative uniformity throughout the house. The old one struggled to keep us in the low 80s on hotter days.
I’m so glad that J is back with his mother and closer to you. I am sure he is happy to have new clothes, laptop and backpack. You might find some good things at Goodwill even though their prices have gone up. I hope it all continues to get even better.
I’m not a bit opposed to getting his play clothes from Goodwill, if I can find something decent there. (It’s really hit-and-miss here, even at the best of times. With the school year starting, I suspect the kids’ clothes will be pretty slim pickings for a while.)
But for the new school year I wanted him to start with new things he actually likes. We’ll get his wardrobe built up a little at a time, but needed to jump-start things because we were so short on time. I believe his first day of school is today.