I did finally get to sleep last night – though it took G coming to the living room and demanding I come to bed with him.
There’s a puzzling aspect to our marriage. Despite the lack of actual nookie, G is otherwise pretty physically affectionate with me. Lots of hugs, lots of kisses, snuggling, all that. In fact, he has a tendency to go into a pout if for any reason I don’t spend at least a little time next to him on the sofa every night, just snuggled up together. We generally fall asleep with his arm wrapped around me.
For anyone who knows the whole history, it adds another layer of mud to the mess. And it’s been a long time since I was young enough to enjoy mud pies. (Mud wrestling depends on who I’m wrestling with, but that’s a whole ‘nother story.)
Today was sort of better. I didn’t work, always a plus. Mother Nature delivered us the kind of weather anyone stuck in snow would probably kill to acquire in trade – gorgeous blue skies, daytime temps in the low 70’s F, a light breeze just enough to keep things interesting.
We went to a couple of favorite haunts and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves, spending only about the equivalent of one decent lunch. We’re beginning to look in earnest at this whole house-buying thing. I initially wanted to start talking with realtors right away. After thinking a little more about about it, I decided to backtrack a bit and instead start shopping around for financing. If that’s covered up front, finding an actual house will be the easy part.
Ultimately if we can’t qualify for a loan – which is sadly a distinct possibility – we’ll take another approach, probably the OWC version even though I’ve gotten burned that way in the past.
I like our apartment and so does G. Unfortunately we recently discovered that for new tenants, rents are now $150 a month below what we’re paying. Considering how long we’ve been here, that we pay on time, keep our place clean, are pretty much the ideal tenants – we agreed there’s no way we’ll renew out lease again this year. Worst-case scenario we’ll do month-to-month after our lease expires until we can get our own place.
We went looking this morning at one neighborhood we’re considering. It’s on the northeastern side of Big City, actually one of the better parts of town. A move there would slash my commute by more than half, and we both loved the feel of the area. G kind of cracked me up though – it was one of the few times his upwardly-mobile self came to the forefront. He made the statement that if we moved there he’d tell people we lived in the city next door (the one where I actually work.) Said city next door is what I frequently refer to as “Snobs-dale” rather than the actual name.
Surprisingly enough, we could afford a 2-bedroom townhouse in Snobs-dale, albeit pretty much nothing else. In the adjacent area in Big City where we’re focusing our search, it’s all modest ranch-style homes. With very few exceptions the places are in good repair, yards neat and clean, no junker cars, etc – in short, it looks like a nice family neighborhood. It’s certainly leaps and bounds better than anywhere I’ve lived since I was a kid growing up in the midwest.
So why am I still in a funk?
Probably because the finances are still up to me and whilst I’m making reasonably good money, I’m still shouldering a hella lot of bills alone, including (no big surprise here) the extra costs my daughter swore to me she was going to pay. She finally walked out on her job tonight, and won’t be going back. I can’t blame her. Despite their promise to make her full-time asap, it was literally costing her more to work there than she was making. They were scheduling her for three-hour shifts, three and four days a week. (Full time my ass!) Between child support and bus fare for the days when she has no other alternatives, she is going in the hole every week now. It’s a long haul from here to her store and it’s cost me a lot in gas to haul her back and forth on the days I’m off work – not to mention the wear and tear on my system to forgo even a single night off where I can stay home and rest.
So once more, it’s all on me to make it happen.
I know there were a lot of people who called me terminally insane for taking G back, and they were absolutely correct in their assessments. I haven’t forgotten everything that came before. Nonetheless, I’m glad he’s here. If it weren’t for G’s help these last few months, I truly believe I would have died (or at the very least imploded physically and emotionally) long ago.
One reader weighed in on my new design right after I enabled it. It took some nudges and a couple of swift kicks to get everything working, but I’m glad it finally got there. For some reason, one member of my blogroll refuses to play nice. Yankee Chick’s name is all hosed up and nothing I’ve done seems to change it. I like this design enough that I’m willing to put up with a couple of minor glitches, if I can’t get them to resolve.
Random unrelated source of extreme irritation: people on Craigslist who pretend to be offering some great deal whilst they are in fact attempting to rip you off (or worse.) Recent examples:
Someone who wanted to “hire” somebody to show up and work for him UNPAID – with the generous addendum, “Bring your own lunch. I don’t want any freeloaders”!!! Tonight, someone posted “free firewood!” When you looked into it, he wants you to come haul away a tree stump he had dug up. A few weeks ago G found someone wanting to hire a nanny with a pretty stiff list of requirements. Had to be trilingual, able to work something like 12 hours a day, had to travel to and from their home in Mid-Timbuktu, Arizona, and this and thus, had to transport Precious Snowflake from point A to B, C, D and E (without reimbursement for travel costs) – and the salary they quoted came out to approximately $1.20 an hour.
When I read BS like that, I just want to reach out and throttle someone.
Pumpkin time. I’m nodding off at the keyboard. Time for me to call it a night and make it stick. You can keep the glass slipper. It hurts my feet anyway.